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Re: [News] 14 vulnerabilities in Windows, Clippy Opens Door to Hijackers

In comp.os.linux.advocacy, Roy Schestowitz
<newsgroups@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
 wrote
on Sat, 14 Apr 2007 02:51:05 +0100
<3034909.Err0i3cU7o@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>:
> __/ [ The Ghost In The Machine ] on Friday 13 April 2007 16:40 \__
>
>> In comp.os.linux.advocacy, Jeanette Russo
>> <jrusso2@xxxxxxxxxxx>
>>  wrote
>> on Thu, 12 Apr 2007 20:19:00 -0700
>> <EECTh.77682$mJ1.32528@xxxxxxxxxxxx>:
>>> Roy Schestowitz wrote:
>>>> Microsoft and the Clippy of death
>>>> 
>>>> ,----[ Quote ]
>>>> | Microsoft has issued five new critical security bulletins, offering
>>>> | patches for 14 vulnerabilities in Windows products, including one
>>>> | that could allow the much-derided Clippy software assistant to take
>>>> | full control of a PC on behalf of a bad guy.
>>>> `----
>>>> 
>>>>
> http://www.cbronline.com/article_news.asp?guid=CFE81578-B0A5-42DA-9567-29E6BE17BB81
>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> Related:
>>>> 
>>>> Botnet 'pandemic' threatens to strangle the net
>>>> 
>>>> ,----[ Quote ]
>>>> | Cerf estimated that between 100 million and 150 million of the
>>>> | 600 million PCs on the internet are under the control of hackers,
>>>> | the BBC reports.
>>>> `----
>>>> 
>>>> http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/01/26/botnet_threat/
>>>
>>> I never did trust that stupid talking paper clip
>>>
>>> Jeanette
>> 
>> Could be worse.  They could have used Scuzzo the Rat. ;-)
>
> Or Theo.
>
> No, I kid, I kid. :-)
>

Hmm...just as well.  Theo was not one of the BOB icons
(at least, not that Wiki mentions).

One wonders what Sun thought of "Java, the coffee-drinking
dragon from Guatemala", though.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Microsoft_Bob 

Personally, I think he needs to be better drawn.  :-)
I'm not sure if that's an orange coffee cup or a patch on
his chest.  The chair looks absolutely horrid.  (Not that
that's saying much in Microsoft Bob, though one can at
least recognize that Will is wearing something vaguely
Elizabethan.  But I doubt The Bard would have wanted to
work for Microsoft.  Maybe that's why he quit sometime
prior to 2003.)

Duke may be a weird-looking rocketship with a big red
nose and appendages, but he doesn't have a bad case of
the jaggies.  (Does BOB's Java have a plush toy?)

http://java.sun.com/features/1999/05/duke.html
http://www.java.com/en/dukeszone/

Apparently the Wiki missed a few -- Chaz is not mentioned
therein, but is mentioned in

http://www.dans20thcenturyabandonware.com/ms-bob-friends.html

I guess Chaz has to toot his own horn.  *badaboom Crash*
I'm tempted to edit the Wiki entry but am not sure I can
describe him; he's either a cross between a trumpet and
a musical note, or a wingless fly in a suit with a very
large hornlike red nose.  And one has to be careful;
he's painted black.

One wonders why the ad people went into so much detail as
to where they are born.

The Dot, in particular, is, well, a smiling red dot.
(Sort of like TRON's bit, only much more stupid looking.)

Birthday: everyday
Hometown: motherboard
Habitat: the net
Favorite Food: bits and bytes
Helpfulness: very helpful

Erm...yeah.  If I wanted a big red dot I'd just go with Duke. :-)
(Duke probably dances better, too.)

For his part, Chaos is a cat, so the following might be expected:

Birthday: April Fool's Day
Hometown: Paris
Habitat: hotels de luxe
Favorite food: bouillabaisse
Helpfulness: less helpful

(In case anyone's wondering -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bouillabaisse
contains a nice picture, as well as a description of the fish stew.
Actually looks rather tasty.  Plus, how many foods are associated with
Roman mythology? :-) )

Some of the others are also "less helpful".
For example, Speaker has the following entries:

Birthday: none
Hometown: none
Habitat: none
Favorite food: AC/DC (interesting notion, that; does the band know?)
Helpfulness: less helpful

One would think he'd at least have a habitat of "portable
radio" or something.

At that, he's an improvement over Invisible:

Birthday: Not telling
Hometown: Nowhere
Habitat: The Ether
Favorite food: Nothing
Helpfulness: you're on your own.

or for that matter Clippy the paper clip, who apparently
didn't get into this list of misfit toys. :-)

However, he did make it into this list:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clippy

as well as Dot, the Genius (an Einstein lookalike --
surprise surprise), Hoverbot, Office puzzle logo (does
it talk??), Orby -- well, sort of; he, erm, I mean, she,
is now "Mother Nature" and loses his, erm her, mouth and
eyes -- Power Pup, Scribble the Cat and Will -- as of 1997.

It's interesting to see these mutate in 2003.  Merlin
replaces Will and Genius, Scribble becomes Links (and
rather cuter); PowerPup becomes Rocky and loses his
super powers.  HoverBot gains eyes, loses hovering, and
becomes F1, the ... walking thing visually reminiscent
of Johnny 5 from Short Circuit, but named for an entirely
different circuit.

And then there's XP Media Center dancers.  Don't ask me,
ask

http://www.microsoft.com/windowsxp/downloads/desktop/dancers.mspx

No Theo here either, but they do have Boo Who? the
ghost, Kris, the Holiday Elf, Arkantos, and a number of
fully-clothed men and women doing various dances, I guess.

The page doesn't indicate exactly what they're supposed
to do.  This has got to be one of the more bizarre sales
concepts I've seen in awhile.  Well, OK, there was that
Microsoft moth guy.  Or was that moth-eaten?  Apparently his
official logo is "Butterfly Man", which is one reason I'm
having trouble finding it -- well, that, and

http://directmag.com/mag/marketing_microsoft_butterfly_lays/

I didn't know butterflies could lay eggs...but this one did.

And remember...all this is thanks to the Mighty Microsoft
Marketing Machine, which gives you the highest quality
software ever achieved in the history of mankind.  Well,
OK, maybe the highest quality marketing ever achieved in
the...well, OK, some bad drawings and a guy in a moth suit,
but hey, whatever...at least he wasn't arrested and charged
with endangering Boston like Turner Broadcasting's Aqua
Teen Hunger Force! ;-)

My brain hurts.

-- 
#191, ewill3@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
New Technology?  Not There.  No Thanks.

-- 
Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com


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